School Survival


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Why do kids hate school? A guide for parents

School ruins the experience of learning

Think about how school operates. The rigid structure, the standardized tests, the endless homework. There’s no room for creativity, no time to explore their own interests. Learning becomes a chore, a means to an end, rather than a joyful journey of discovery. Your child is told what to learn, how to learn, and when to learn it, with little regard for their unique passions and talents. This cookie-cutter approach crushes their spirit.

Schools often emphasize conformity over individuality. Your child is expected to fit into a mold, to behave in ways that may not align with who they are. They must sit still, follow directions, and perform on demand. If they don’t, they’re labeled as troublemakers, lazy, or even diagnosed with disorders.

Remember how excited your child was to learn about the world, about new things? That excitement fades when learning is no longer about discovery but about meeting expectations and avoiding failure. They become more focused on grades than on understanding. They start to believe that their worth is tied to their academic performance. It’s a heavy burden for anyone, especially a child.

School is boring, exhausting, and stressful

Day after day, our kids are fed a monotonous diet of lectures, worksheets, and standardized tests. Their natural curiosity is stifled by a rigid curriculum that leaves no room for exploration or creativity. The subjects they are forced to study often seem irrelevant to their lives, and the way they are taught makes even the most interesting topics feel dull. Imagine spending hours in a room where your mind is constantly wandering, where you are told to sit still and be quiet when all you want to do is ask questions and learn in a way that makes sense to you. That’s the reality for many kids.

The early mornings, long hours, and heavy workload leave our kids physically and mentally drained. By the time they get home, they have little energy left for anything else. Homework piles up, and weekends become a time to catch up on sleep rather than a chance to relax and enjoy life. This relentless schedule takes a toll on their well-being. They’re tired, and they’re struggling to keep up with the demands placed on them.

The pressure to perform, to get good grades, and to meet expectations is overwhelming. Our kids are constantly being tested and evaluated, and the fear of failure looms large. They worry about their future, about whether they’re good enough, and about how they measure up to their peers. This stress can lead to anxiety, depression, and a sense of hopelessness. They’re living in a state of perpetual tension, always on edge, always worried about what’s coming next.

It takes up way too much time, especially including homework

One of the biggest reasons kids hate school is the sheer amount of time it consumes, and that includes the endless hours of homework.

They wake up early, often before the sun has fully risen, to trudge off to school. There, they spend six to eight hours sitting in a classroom, their minds forced to engage with subjects that might not interest them or might even confuse and frustrate them. Then, when the final bell rings, instead of feeling a sense of freedom, they are burdened with the knowledge that they still have hours of homework waiting for them at home.

There's not enough time to unwind, pursue hobbies, or just be a kid. They miss out on the vital experiences that build their identities and passions. Play, creativity, and relaxation get sidelined. They become like robots, programmed to complete tasks but devoid of joy.

It's irrelevant to the real world, and they know it

Do you remember when you were young, the feeling of sitting in a classroom, watching the clock tick away as you struggled to understand why you were there? Now imagine that multiplied by the rapid changes in today's world. Kids today aren't just disengaged; they’re disheartened. They look at the textbooks filled with outdated information, at lessons that don't seem to connect with their lives, and they feel a deep, gnawing sense of irrelevance.

They’re keenly aware of the disconnect between what they’re being taught and what they see in the world around them. They live in a time where information is at their fingertips, where they can learn coding, graphic design, or start a business online with a few clicks. Yet, they’re stuck in a system that hasn't fundamentally changed in over a century.

Your child is smart; they see the gap. They know that learning to solve quadratic equations won’t help them understand the complexities of human relationships or how to create a sustainable future.

They crave relevance. They want their education to matter, to feel connected to the world they’re growing up in. They want to learn about climate change and how they can make a difference. They want to understand the technology that surrounds them and how to harness it for good. They want to explore their passions and see how they can turn those into a livelihood. But the current system, with its standardized tests and one-size-fits-all approach, leaves little room for that kind of meaningful learning.

Cliques, popularity contests, bullying and abuse

You send your child off to school each day, hoping they're safe, hoping they're learning, hoping they're happy. But what if they're not? What if, instead of finding a place to grow, they're navigating a battleground of cliques, popularity contests, bullying, and abuse? It's a reality that many kids face, and it's a big reason why so many of them hate school.

Disrespectful teachers who demand respect in return

There are teachers who belittle, humiliate, or dismiss students' voices expect nothing short of unwavering respect in return. They wield their authority like a weapon, mistaking fear for respect. Your child, caught in this toxic dynamic, is left feeling small, powerless, and angry.

Respect is not something that can be demanded; it must be earned. And it cannot be earned through intimidation or control. A teacher who genuinely respects their students listens to them, values their opinions, and treats them as human beings. When respect flows both ways, the classroom becomes a place of mutual growth, not a battleground.

Kids Love Freedom, But School is an Oppressive Environment

School, for many kids, feels like a prison. It's a place where they have to conform, obey, and fit into a mold that was never designed for them. From the moment they walk through those doors, they're told what to do, how to think, and who to be. There's no room for their individuality, their creativity, or their unique way of seeing the world. They're expected to sit still, be quiet, and absorb information that often feels irrelevant and disconnected from their lives.

Your kid loves freedom. They crave the ability to explore, to question, to discover things on their own terms. They want to follow their interests, dive deep into subjects that fascinate them, and learn in ways that feel meaningful. But school doesn't allow for that. Instead, it imposes a rigid structure, a one-size-fits-all curriculum that stifles their natural curiosity and enthusiasm.

It's even harder for neurodivergent kids

Neurodivergent kids—those who are autistic, have ADHD, dyslexia, or other differences in how their brains work—experience the world in ways that most people don't. School, with its rigid structure and one-size-fits-all approach, often isn't designed with their needs in mind. Instead of a place of learning and growth, school can become a daily battlefield.

Imagine waking up every morning knowing you're heading into a place where the lights are too bright, the sounds are too loud, and the rules don't make sense. A place where you're constantly misunderstood, where your unique way of thinking and processing is seen as a problem to be fixed rather than a strength to be celebrated. It's no wonder so many neurodivergent kids hate school.

Instead of nurturing their talents and accommodating their needs, schools often try to force neurodivergent kids into molds that don't fit them. This can lead to frustration, anxiety, and a profound sense of alienation.

Also Read:

For Parents: My kid hates school, what do I do?

Where to next? Pick one!

Posted in: For Parents, Knowledgebase on June 25, 2024 @ 3:48 AM


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